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Kill 'em all. Strap them to the chair and juice them with 2,400 volts. Bake at 140 degrees Fahrenheit for 30 seconds and then let cool for the autopsy. Now that I have your attention, let's get this death penalty thing straight. Death penalty opponents forget who we're talking about. (6) comments
Have a craving for bear brisket? Wander on down to Yosemite National Park for some savory Smokey the Bear filets. If you have an inkling for some moose meat, then head on over to Yellowstone National Park for some bold-flavored Bullwinkle burgers. It's easy as one, two, three. (13) comments
What's more American than apple pie? Nothing, that's what. Now, try to think of a Norman Rockwellian holiday scene involving apple pie. What do you get? I'll bet dollars to doughnuts that you're imagining a nice painted scene of a family sitting around a table, with perhaps a grandmotherly figure hovering over said apple pie with a slicing device, about to divide and distribute the pie. (0) comments
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