Michael Pasaoa

MySpace lives to tell our stories

Idle profiles keep memories of lost loved ones alive

By: Michael Pasaoa

Posted: 4/16/08

MySpace is our digital tombstone - our online funeral that will eventually immortalize all of us users with memories to dig up after we're buried.

It hit me a couple years ago when friends of mine lost their friend in a car accident.

She still remains on some of their "Top 8" lists, and they leave comments on her page saying they had another dream about her, wishing her happy birthday, or just simply letting her know that something reminded them of her today.

I looked at her "Top 8" list, and it made me realize that those eight people were the closest to her before she passed away, and although she's gone, she'll continue to live through them.

It hit me again last year when my friend was sent to Iraq. I wasn't sure if I'd see him again. I wasn't sure if his MySpace log-in date would freeze frame.

Luckily, he's back home.

The idea of a MySpace funeral hit me hardest the other week when someone posted a bulletin saying her friend passed away, and she regretted not knowing her more. She said people called into the local radio station and had a tribute for her on-air with song dedications.

A couple days later, another bulletin was posted, but this time it said the girl faked her death and that everyone hates her now. People even virtually defaced a banner that was created in her honor, writing negative comments, scribbling images across it, and spamming the bulletin boards with the news that she was still alive.

One guy went as far as to say she was trying to be 2Pac.

All these instances made me think of my own life, my own MySpace. My old account was hacked, so my first comment on my new one only stretches back to October 2006. I revisited all of them, though, and refreshed my memory of friends I've drifted from, and grown closer to over the months.

From drunken nights to sober days on the beach. From strangers leaving comments from '06 such as "What are you doing tonight?" to recent ones of them now saying "What are we doing tonight?"

I know we're not supposed to spend every waking moment living through a Web site, but it's hard not to understand that this will be an everlasting piece of how we can be remembered.

I have a music MySpace page where I've posted a couple songs I've recorded with my friends, and that will be a way for me to talk to people even after I leave. In one of the songs, I had a line that went like:

"All that's going to be left of me in a sense / Are my friends - walking, talking memories in the flesh."

For the most part, our friend lists can be the most in-depth sources for pinpointing everyone we've met throughout our lives who made a difference. I know some people get emotional and delete their MySpace accounts over online drama, but I'm pretty sure most of us will keep them until we, yeah, die.

Our default pictures will change. From high school graduation pictures to college graduation pictures. From wedding pictures to pictures with our first children. MySpace will continue to catalog the parts of our lives that we choose to display to the public.

I'm not sure if we'll grow out of this stage and eventually stop updating, or checking for our friends' updates, but we'll never know when our time's up.

We'll always be remembered online.

If memory has a lane, MySpace is the avenue.