Maybe certain people shouldn't be allowed to watch any TV

Yes, I Have a Point

By: Angelo Lanham

Posted: 11/17/08

I've decided that I'm going to start issuing an "Idiot of the Month Award."

This month's winners are Brian Tirao Deguzman, Allen Tam Vu and Armando Anaya Mendez, who were inspired by sources no less ridiculous than the "Ocean's Eleven" movie to rob a Wells Fargo bank in San Jose.

Now, the dictionary definition of the word "idiot" is "a simple, unlearned person."

It would seem that a trio that can be convinced to rob a Wells Fargo based on what they saw in a big-budget movie involving casino robberies and George Clooney would be rather fitting of this title.

It was an inside job, according to an article in the San Jose Mercury News. Deguzman was the branch manager, and Mendez, who also worked there, was responsible for ordering a large sum of money, unseasonably, in preparation for the robbery.

Their friend, Vu, wearing the foolproof disguise of a hat and sunglasses, grabbed Mendez from outside the branch, walked him in and demanded that he and Deguzman open the safe.

The money was handed to him in a nice paper bag, and Vu walked off.

Interestingly, though, Vu made off with some undisclosed six-figure amount. According to the article, this is pretty rare, since most robbers make it out with perhaps a few thousand dollars.

The order of the unseasonable extra money I mentioned was the red flag that helped catch the trio.

It's one of those cases in which the thinking is so smart that it's stupid. Even in the realm of movie plots, this idiot trio, who apparently spent months planning this robbery post "Ocean's Eleven" viewing, should have realized the goofy amount of loopholes contained within their plan, which within 14 hours of its hatching had already seen their capture.

It all opens up so many questions. If "Ocean's Eleven" inspired them to rob a bank, would "Three Amigos" have inspired them to don large hats and ride mules around some desert, searching for a silent spaghetti western to star in?

Would "Wild Hogs" have inspired a cross-country motorcycle trip laced with poor humor?

This opens up a whole discussion about stimulus and how much responsibility it holds for the actions of the dumb.

After the Columbine shootings, the computer game "Doom" and the music of Marilyn Manson became scapegoats as the key bad influences that caused the kids to go wrong.

But really, am I to believe that every psychotic killer listens to some sort of teen-goth music and plays violent video games? Are there no more wild-eyed gunmen who listen to the Beatles and play pinball?

Besides that, I played a disproportionate amount of "Mortal Kombat" through my middle-school years, and not once did I decapitate, yank a spinal cord out of or set fire to any of my classmates.

A recent porn forum at SJSU described pornography as an evil force that seeks to ruin people's lives by creating within said people a sudden, insatiable urge to either have ridiculous amounts of sex or at least shave their pubic hair.

Again, though, this doesn't mesh because I have trouble believing that anyone who watches the sordid plots contained within pornography should really think that pizza girls really do strip down and do the nasty when they deliver.

It's fairly obvious, to me, at least, that when people snap after a round of "Grand Theft Auto" and a midnight viewing of "The Naughty Nurses" that it has more to do with the fact that the person in question is not playing with a full deck than with his or her media choices.

But people continue to attempt to ban types of music, video games and pornography because it gives our children these nasty ideas they wouldn't have come across on their own.

The great part about this robbery story is that I simply can't imagine a group of church ladies sitting around a table for tea saying, "Well, that 'Ocean's Eleven' movie is a danger, and I knew it all along. That Matt Damon is destroying our youth, am I right, ladies?"

If they had been playing "Halo" before the robbery, I'm sure that there would be some sort of backlash from the tea ladies, as there would be if they had watched "Natural Born Killers."

But they watched "Ocean's Eleven." No one is going to ban "Ocean's Eleven."

Right?